10 Ways to Build Self-Confidence

Confidence is a great tool which can make your life easier.

I’ve given you 10 ways which will help you  to grow your confidence (it worked for me :) :) :) ).

1. Personal development is a great thing, so sign up for a course/workshop and enjoy it.

2. Go to a networking event and focus on meeting people rather worry about what people will think about you. I know it's not easy. Practise!!!!

3. When you are at a social event, don’t just stick with the people you know but go and have a conversation with someone you don’t know. I know it sounds difficult but believe me it needs practise.

4. Do one thing that makes you smile each day.  

5. Are you scared of looking stupid in front of other people?? You and everyone else. It’s not a big thing so don’t let it stop you. Say: “It doesn’t matter.” After all who really cares???? No-one!!!!

6. If there’s someone in your life who puts you down or makes you feel small, you own it to yourself to let them know that you expect something different from now on. Mark Twain said: “Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that but the really great make you believe you too, can become great.”

7. When you feel you want shout “I deserve better than this!” take a step back and say “I can BE better than this. ” Be the Change you wish to see in the World. ~ Gandhi

8. Confidence sometimes means admitting you’re wrong. Take always responsibility about your actions and words.

9. Keep telling yourself that you ARE confident. Say it enough times, and frequently enough and your subconscious will make you start believing it’s true. The more you believe it’s true, the more it turns into the truth.

10. Learn to say “No” It’s better politely to decline a request rather than bring yourself in to difficult position.

Using GROW model to achieve goal setting for work and personal life

The GROW model is an incredibly simple, yet incredibly effective model for achieving your goals in life and work. The good thing is that it can be used by anyone without special training. Below I will show how you can use it and hopefully it will be helpful to you as much is for me.

 

GROW is an acronym for:

• Goal

Goal is your aim

Where you want to be.  Use one goal at time and be as specific as possible. To help you may ask yourself the below questions:

What do you want?

How will you know when you achieve it?

When do you want to achieve it by?

 

• Reality

Exploring the present reality

Reality is there you are now regarding your goal. Where are you now in relation to your goal? How far along are you towards achieving it?

What have you done specifically so far to achieve your goal?

What challenges have you met and how you overcome them?

What strengths do you have which may help?

 

• Option

Stretching beyond what you have tried or thought about before

Here you need to think as many options as possible to achieve your goal. There may be a single option, or there may be multiple options from which to choose. At the beginning it may be difficult to think many options but writing down all your options/ideas even if you think they are stupid or crazy, eventually it will help you to think good options to help you towards achieving your goals.

Questions to help you:

What could you do?

What else?

• Will/ Way forward

Gaining commitment from you towards taking action

This is the final stage where you need to decide which option is the best to achieve your goal. Also, you need to think about the barriers what may stop you from doing it and what can you do about it.
Question to think about:

Which options would be fastest/best/preferred?

What might stop me?

When will I take action?

This is where the action begins!!!!

GROW model is a powerful tool and many life coaches use it to coach their clients. I have been using it personally a year now and I can tell it's an amazing tool.

Good Luck with your goals!!!

Interpretation of Dreams- Freud method

Psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud believed that the interpretation of dreams was the “Royal Road to the unconscious.” In examining the content of dreams, Freud developed a number of theories. Amongst these was the interpretation of subconscious thought and how this was expressed in a symbolic language in dreams to avoid the potentially disturbing or harmful content of the unconscious mind.

In his work, Freud categorised the mind into three main parts:

· The Id – which holds all desires, unchecked urges and the fulfilment of wishes;

· The Ego – this is interpreted as the conscious mind;

· The Superego – this exists to maintain censorship over the Id.

During wake time, the Superego functions to control the Id and to keep in check the impulses and desires it develops. In this way, the Superego could be seen as the ‘conscience’ of the mind. Conversely, during sleep periods and through the function of dreaming, one can be aware of the unconscious mind, the Id. Because dreams exist without the normal state of consciousness and conscience, the Id has the opportunity to push all hidden desires to the fore. However, such raw and unchecked desires can be so psychologically virulent that a ‘censor’ is employed by the mind to translate the Id’s values into a more acceptable form of symbolism. This self-induced protection functions to preserve the quality of sleep and prevent adverse reaction to uncontrolled dream imagery. Resultant, cryptic and confusing dreams can occur.

Therefore, if the dream itself can be understood more clearly this could lead to better understanding of the subconscious mind. Fundamentally, Freud believed that dreams constituted “the fulfilment of a wish.” He further proposed that dreams were comprised of two parts:

· Manifest content;

· Latent content.

Manifest content was that which a person could remember upon waking and which they could later describe to another person when recalling their dream. Freud proffered that this manifest dream content was itself meaningless since it only existed to represent the true thought underlying the dream. Freud strongly believed that it was latent content which held the true meaning of the dream – that is, the forbidden thoughts and unconscious desires rendered by the Id. Although these are contained in the manifest content, they are masked and unrecognisable as their true form.

The process which occurs in order for latent dream content to be transformed into more mundane manifest content was described by Freud as ‘dreamwork. ’This dreamwork process exists to re-interpret latent thoughts in four main ways:

1. Condensation
Two or more latent thoughts are combined to make one manifest dream image. A number of dream elements such as themes, images, figures and ideas, are combined so the dream becomes more condensed.

2. Displacement

Emotions and desires are transferred onto a meaningless or unrelated object in the manifest dream and hence avoid the true target of intention.

3. Representation

Complex or very vague concepts are converted into the imagery and the mind may adopt similar words or objects instead of portraying its true intent. Freud stated that dream symbolism was mainly derived from sexual intention which suggests most dreams have a sexual correlation.

4. Secondary revision

In this final stage of dreamwork, Freud advised that absurd and incoherent elements are lost. Thereby, secondary revision can be interpreted as the organisation of the dream into a pattern which is relative and synchronised with the dreamer’s experience of everyday life.

Freud insisted that dreams were inherently formed as a means for the mind to fulfil its otherwise suppressed wishes. If a wish, most likely to be sexual in origin, was unsatisfied during the daily life of the dreamer, then the mind would react to this internal stimulus by creating a visual and explicit fantasy in dreamtime in order to satisfy root desires. He posited that this would create an internal equilibrium and therefore allow for a peaceful night’s sleep

In interpreting the meaning of dreams, Freud used the ‘free association’ method to unearth the underlying latent content behind the dream itself. His patients were asked to describe their dreams in detail and relay the manifest content. They were then asked to focus on a particular element of the dream and form as many associations to this as they were able. This process was continued until all manifest content associations had been discovered and essentially allowed for the ‘dreamwork’ process to be peeled back to reveal the core latent content.

There are many ways to interpret dreams and different psychoanalysts have used various methodologies to analyse what our dreams could possibly represent. Dreams can mean a multitude of things and there are different theories on how to interpret them and the importance that dreams should be afforded. Using Freud's methods of interpretation the results were clear but not finite and could be totally different from the conclusions reached if another methodology, such as that of Jung, was used.

Try it with your friends. I believe it's a nice, funny exercise (as long as the dream is not painful memory). You never know, it may reveal the unconscious truth about you. Good Luck.

PS. The style of this article in not conversational because it was part from my essay.